A Gentle Word for Those Facing Delays in Marriage
Delay is not refusal. Keep taking the practical steps — Mizwaj is one of them, on App Store · Google Play
Many men and women experience delays in marriage due to a variety of social and personal reasons, which can sometimes lead to feelings of frustration and despair. Allah has shown us the remedy for such feelings in His Noble Book: "Is He [not best] who responds to the desperate one when he calls upon Him and removes evil," highlighting the importance of supplication in easing difficulties and relieving the distress and sadness a person may feel.
Why Do Some People Experience Delays in Marriage?
The issue of delayed marriage is common in modern societies, where many individuals choose to postpone marriage until later in life. It is difficult to pinpoint a single reason behind this trend, as there are often multiple factors influencing a person's decision to delay marriage. Among the most common reasons for this issue are:
There are many reasons that delay marriage for women in particular and for men in general. The most prominent include:
- Lack of compatibility between a woman and her suitor.
- The presence of certain qualities that men and women desire in their future spouse.
- Family rejection of potential suitors.
- The high cost of mahr and general living expenses, which cause men to delay marriage.
- The pursuit of personal freedom by young people, leading them to avoid marriage.
- The numerous conditions families place on suitors.
- Being involved in impermissible relationships.
Why Does Islam Encourage Marriage?
Allah does not legislate anything without wisdom; every command has a purpose. Islam's legislation of marriage aims to achieve a number of noble objectives, the most well-known of which include:
- Protecting youth from temptation.
- Increasing the ummah.
- Providing emotional and psychological stability for the Muslim individual.
- Purifying society from immorality.
- Finding a partner who helps one worship Allah.
- Developing the earth and ridding it of corruption.
- Relieving individuals from loneliness.
A Gentle Word for Those Facing Delays in Marriage:
There are many women who have graduated from university, started their careers, and waited a long time for marriage, yet Allah has not decreed it for them yet. Some of them feel anxious and burdened by this delay. We want you to know that your feelings are natural and your concern is understandable, but remaining passive should not continue for long, because Allah encourages us to strive and take the necessary steps.
When you take practical steps, seek to achieve your goal, and then place your trust in Allah and make du'a, you will find the peace and reassurance you are searching for.
As Allah says: "Is He [not best] who responds to the desperate one when he calls upon Him and removes evil."
The most important thing to believe is that only Allah can ease your path to marriage and bring you the most suitable partner. If Allah delays something, it is for a wisdom known only to Him, so remain reassured and do not despair.
Steps to Take When Facing Delays in Marriage:
When we talk about taking practical steps, it is important to clarify what you can do in the following lines:
Complete Trust That Delays in Marriage and All Matters Are in Allah's Hands:
When you reach a state of contentment with what Allah has decreed for you—whether it is a delay in marriage or a change in your studies—your approach to life's matters will change, and your trust that Allah is the Lord of all goodness and the One who facilitates it for you will increase.
Persist in Du'a and Humble Supplication to Allah, Trusting in His Response:
Supplication is one of the most important and effective means of facilitating marriage when it is delayed. Allah assures us in His revealed Book that whoever calls upon Him with certainty in His response and hope in His generosity, He will honor them. This is clear in His words: "Is He [not best] who responds to the desperate one when he calls upon Him and removes evil."
Keep Yourself Busy with Other Beneficial Pursuits:
If you are experiencing a delay in marriage, do not dwell on it excessively. Try to use this time to develop yourself, strive for success, and achieve your goals. Focusing on one issue to the exclusion of all else can lead to discouragement.
When Facing Delays in Marriage, Build New Social Connections:
Your social relationships and meeting people in different gatherings and places can help facilitate your marriage and help you find a suitable partner, as many people are continually searching in various places for the right spouse.
Give Charity with the Intention of Easing the Matter:
Charity is one of the best actions you can take to resolve the issue of delayed marriage. Whoever eases the affairs of a servant of Allah, Allah will ease their affairs and relieve their distress.
Thus, giving charity can be a key to making this matter easier for you and a means to attain what you hope for without much effort.
In conclusion, regarding the reasons for delayed marriage and how to strive to achieve this goal, we see that even if marriage is delayed, Allah only delays matters for a profound wisdom. Therefore, one must be patient and place their trust in Allah.
Keep hope, and keep looking. Many on Mizwaj waited too, and then did not.
