What Is Unconscious Marriage?
An unconscious marriage usually begins with an unconscious choice. Choose deliberately on Mizwaj — the app is on App Store · Google Play
Most of us believe that deciding to get married is a rational choice we make after careful thought and evaluating the relationship and its prospects. But have you ever considered that unconscious marriage might actually play the biggest role in our decisions on this matter?
In fact, the subconscious is often the main factor in choosing a specific life partner among all others.
In this article, we’ll explore how the subconscious mind works in our romantic relationships and its particular influence on marriage.
What Is Unconscious Marriage?
First, let’s define conscious marriage: it is a relationship between two people based on maturity, as well as psychological and spiritual awareness. Its foundation is understanding, along with affection and love. In such a relationship, both partners make decisions after research, discussion, and analysis, so both are active participants in the relationship.
From this definition, we can deduce what unconscious marriage is: it is an immature relationship between two people that does not result from a conscious decision, but rather as a reaction from the subconscious mind within the human psyche.
Reactions in Unconscious Marriage
Our unconscious reactions to daily situations and pressures in marriage can vary. We may notice a range of reactions or defense mechanisms, such as:
The Role of the Primitive Brain in Marriage
This part of the brain often employs certain psychological defense techniques to protect our mental well-being.
It can blind us to the reality of a situation, making us attach more deeply to our partner and think of them as a priority in our lives. Thus, the unconscious desire to ignore and heal wounds is what enables us to give love wholeheartedly.
Guiding the Primitive Brain in Our Lives
Since the primitive brain operates unconsciously, like an animal following its instincts, we need to understand that its reactions are only meant to protect us. We should also try to balance this by using our conscious abilities and skills to guide it.
Using the Fight or Flight Response
It is common in relationships to use this response in sudden situations, especially in marriage.
For example, when a wife faces criticism from her husband, her defensive reaction is often to retaliate with similar criticism or to escape by leaving the room. In both cases, the result is disrupting the harmony of the marriage through an unconscious reaction.
Developing a Non-Defensive Approach
In some cases, people with high emotional intelligence can develop a new, non-defensive approach that satisfies both partners, helps de-escalate the situation, and turns the other person into an ally rather than creating hostility between you.
The Subconscious Mind’s Role in Unconscious Marriage
We know that the subconscious mind always influences our feelings and behavior, and it shapes how we handle things for the first time.
But we may not realize the extent of this influence. Modern theories suggest that the subconscious is the spiritual parent of love in our lives from the very first moment our eyes meet someone.
The subconscious may sense that this is the right person, and begin guiding your actions and behaviors in that direction—or the opposite, if the person is not suitable.
In conclusion, we find that understanding unconscious marriage is essential for preserving the marital relationship, as well as working to develop it in a way that brings both partners lasting happiness and harmony.
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